Spandex dreams

With only five days to go until the big day, the tension in the office is rising! Every sniffle and leg twitch feels like a potential flesh eating flu virus and focusing on anything but the all-too-imminent marathon is proving extremely difficult. Fortunately my main concern (aside from fear of injury) happens to be my most favourite game of all, worrying about what to wear on race day. I’ve always been obsessed with fancy dress; since I could walk I’ve spent most of my spare time expressing my flamboyant side with silly clothes. I look pretty normal during the day, but when the situation demands it, I just can’t resist the urge to dress up like an idiot as soon as I get the chance. From disco space pirates to fluffy bunnies, you name it and I’ll have worn it to a party. So one would think that a marathon would provide the perfect opportunity to express my Lady Gaga esque extravagant side with glee! But getting the right gear to wear for 26.2 miles has proven somewhat difficult. I’m not afraid of looking like a loony, but there’s dressing up, and then there’s dressing up for something you have to wear while running for 26.2 whole miles without dying of pain, sweat, or chafing. I have newfound respect for those nutters you see in banana suits/horse costumes/Fred Flinstone. As if running the distance alone isn’t hard enough without having a scratchy monkey face strapped to your head. I have no idea how they do it.There are of course the halfway fancy dressers; the ladies you see wearing fairy wings with faces daubed in sparkly face paint, or girls wearing day-glow tutus and fluorescent leg warmers. But this is where it gets difficult for me. I can see why they do it (it’s minimal fancy dress, so you can look funky without risking injury) but it’s just not enough for me! I want to look super fly, sexy, funky and original all at once, while still managing to maintain a decent speed and not die of wardrobe malfunction in the process. I want to be Wonder Woman, a disco leopard warrior and Barbarella in space, all at once! Rhalou is not afraid of looking like an idiotBut the fact is, it’s just not practical. If I wear anything fancier than my staple running gear, I risk having a miserable race if anything chafes/falls off/slips down, and God forbid it rains on the day! And don’t get me started on fancy dress gear minus the obligatory lifesaving killer heels. It’s just not quite the same without the extra leg length. Fortunately my colleague Claire is also game, so I roped her into my fancy dress marathon fantasy game, and we’ve been deliberating the perfect race day costume together.I’m desperate to wear my favourite hot pink spandex leggings and day-glow Lunar Glide Nikes, but neither are suitable for a run that long. I depend on sensible Brooks for the bigger runs, and apart from the fact my gorgeous leggings don’t have any pockets, they’re totally see-through in the bum area. After much distress and failed dummy runs (running round the park in Hackney dressed in a spandex space suit was a risky game) Claire and I have had to compromise. In the end we decided to opt for maximum accessories, so we bought some sparkly face paints, colourful hair flowers, and cool swear bands. It’s not quite my Beyoncé in the sky with diamonds fantasy, but it will have to do… After seeing my rants on Twitter about the pocket/leggings conundrum the good folks at Hilly kindly offered to send me a (suitably hot pink) running pouch (AKA bum bag!) so watch this space, I might just make it round the marathon looking like a sci-fi fantasy fluorescent lunatic after all. See you on the other side...